Wedding vows that talk about mating penguins and Broad City

Wedding vows that talk about mating penguins and Broad City

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Offbeat Bride was super-helpful as a guide to writing my non-traditional vows to my husband Bart (we're a gay couple). So I just wanted to share my actual vows, because I thought y'all might get a kick out of them.

Here they are:

Ten years ago, I was sitting in a darkened movie theatre watching the documentary March of the Penguins and struggling not to cry. It was the scene where the emperor penguins had traveled over 100 kilometers to their ancestral breeding ground and had begun to pair off as mates, crossing their beaks over each other to show their love.

It was beautiful and moving, but I also remember thinking: "Where's my penguin?"

Three and a half years ago, I arrived at what would turn out to be my ancestral breeding ground - [our friend] Alan's ugly sweater holiday party - and there you were. It didn't take me long to realize I'd met my life mate. You were funny, you were smart, you were caring, and so intimidatingly handsome. I remember telling my mom early in our relationship that being with you just felt so easy, so right. It made the sometimes cold, sometimes lonely journey to find you so worth it.

I can't believe I get to spend the rest of my life with such an amazing human being.

I promise I will be a worthy partner to you - offering encouragement while you explore your passions and dreams at business school and beyond.

I promise to be an excellent parent to Sofia [our adopted puggle] and to the family I know we both want.

I promise to be your partner-in-crime as we explore the world and forge new adventures, but also your companion on those dark winter nights when we just want to stay in, order sesame chicken, and watch together.

As Morgan Freeman said at the end of that penguin mating scene, and I'm way too nervous to attempt his voice: "These two will participate in an ancient and complicated affair." It's true that our journey together will have its complexities, but it comforts me to know we'll go through it together, and I vow to always give you my most authentic, my most supportive, my most true self.

I love you more than I thought was even possible.

Adorable! Who else has sweet wedding vows to share? Points for more mentions of Morgan Freeman!

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